Ship Shows
by Livexthexmagic
Summary: The Characters of Avatar: TLA are on a TV show type thing called 'Ship Shows' where they discuss the different ships on this site. Kataang and SukixSokkaxYue triangle.
1. Sokka's Ship Show

**Authors Note (1/7/2010): Old fic is old. Some ships really hadn't been written about a whole lot back then...so if you see something like TophxZuko and it's your OTP and the fic says NO ONES THOUGHT OF THIS, don't get offended. ****I'm only continuing adding to it due to requests. Don't like? Don't read. **Also, I've edited the first couple chapters because apparently four years ago I didn't know how to use bold. Also a couple grammatical things, just because it bugs me.

Ok, I'm just doing this for kicks because I'm bored again. Late at night. I don't mean to bash anyone's ship here, so please no flaming, if you don't like it don't read it. Simple!

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**Disclaimer: **I don't own Avatar; I wouldn't be typing this if I owned Avatar

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**Sokka's Ship Show**

Hello and welcome to my show where I, Sokka, analyze what you people call ships. I tell you if I think the ship would happen, wouldn't happen and why. Ok, first ship.

**Katara x Aang**

Okay, I could see that. I don't like the idea of Aang and Katara together, only because Katara is my little sister, but if I had to pick a guy for Katara it would be Aang.

**Zuko x Katara**

No! Ew, no, no, no, no! Who came up with this one?

Producer in background: -shrugs- A lot of people think this is what'll happen.

No. End of story. Katara's like good and Zuko's like bad. No. I just couldn't see them—no. Next ship.

**Sokka x Yue**

Yes, already happened and I fully approve.

**Toph x Aang**

Okay, that's another one I could see. It probably won't happen, but definitely doable.

**Sokka x Suki**

Yeahhh, I like Suki but if it was a choice between her and Yue, Yue would win.

Suki in background: HEY!

Well! I'm sorry! Yue is –sniffles- dead anyway, so in the end you'll be my girl.

Suki: -is satisfied-

**Aang x Meng**

Yeahh, no. Cute and all but Meng's a little annoying, I couldn't handle hanging out with her and Aang.

**Sokka x Azula**

AHH! –stamps card with ship on it- WHO CAME UP WITH THIS? THE SAME PEOPLE WHO CAME UP WITH KATARA X ZUKO?

Producer: -shurg-

FOR ALL YOU ME X AZULA FANS I AM TELLING YOU, NO! NO! STOP THINKING ABOUT IT NO!

**Katara x Haru**

Ehhhh, nice guy, not right for Katara. Haru will find a nice girl someday and they'll be happy together.

**Zuko x Song**

Who?

**Zuko x Mai**

Wait…oh that crazy sarcastic doom girl? Yeah, I suppose. That would be weird though, I don't know where that came from, but yeah ok.

**Katara x Jet**

No! Jet's a jerk and Katara would agree with me on this, no, not a couple.

**Sokka x Toph**

What? Toph's nice and all but not my type. Who came up with that one?

Me: Me. MUHAHAHAHAHA! What? No one's thought of it before!

Sokka: Why must you torture me so!

Me: Cause it's fun.

Sokka: Darn you.

**Momo x Appa**

AHAHAHAAA! –wipes tears- Cute, but they're both guys aren't they? I dunno.

**Sokka x Boomerang**

Um…I love my boomerang but not romantically, you're strange and deranged if your pairing people with inanimate objects.

**Sokka x Momo**

UH HELLO! Momo's a LEMUR! Besides Momo is a guy.

**Sokka x Appa**

Ok, it wasn't funny the first time it won't be funny this time. Quit it. He's a ten-ton flying monster! What is wrong with you!

**Now, onto slash.**

Do I want to know what that is—?

**Aang x Zuko**

AHH!

**Jet x Sokka**

_AHHHH!_

**Sokka x Zuko**

AHHHH!STOP STOP STOP! I'M SCARRED FOR LIFE! -starts to cry- -crawls off stage-

Me: Well, it seems we scared off the host, I suppose it's over.

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Very strange I know but if you like it and you want me to continue with other characters submit a review!

-Kat


	2. Aang's Ship Show

Hey! Thanks so much to my wonderful reviewers frozenheat, SumikotheGREAT and FireSaber! I never thought any one would like this lol. Now it's Aang's turn to be the victim…um I mean guest on the show! Hehehehe….ok here's the next show!

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**Disclaimer: **Yeeaahhhh, I don't own A:TLA, sadly. Not really sad, just sad for me it's probably better for everyone else and for the show.

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**Aang's Ship Show**

Hi! I suppose I supposed to be giving my opinion on these ships! So let's go ahead with this show!

**Katara x Aang**

Oh, how I hope that happens! I mean…Katara and I are just friends… -cough-

**Zuko x Katara**

Oh, no. No, no, no! I couldn't see that, I really hope that doesn't happen! -bites nails-

**Sokka x Yue**

They were a cute couple; it's to bad she died. I really would have liked to see them together.

**Toph x Aang**

No, that won't happen! Toph is my Earthbending master and my friend I would never dream of being with her. She's my best friend.

**Sokka x Suki**

Yeah, that's not to bad, well since Yue isn't around any more –sniff- Sokka could be with her.

**Aang x Meng**

I've already said, haven't I? I like her as a friend, not as she likes me, I'm really sorry Meng! I want to be friends.

**Sokka x Azula**

HAHHAHAHA! That's a joke! No, Sokka would never do that…I can imagine how Sokka reacted to that! -laughs-

**Katara x Haru**

Haru's nice, but Katara is mine…I mean umm no they aren't a couple just friends…-whispers- I hope!

**Zuko x Song**

Who's Song?

Producer: Why are we asking these guys Zuko x Song? They don't know who Song is!

Me: -shrugs- Then don't ask them!

**Toph x Zuko **

-sighs- Again, no not going to happen.

**Zuko x Mai**

Oh, yeah! If Zuko gets matched up that's a good match for him I guess.

**Katara x Jet**

Cool tree house. Not so cool person. Katara is way better than him.

**Sokka x Toph**

Uhm, no, never heard of that pair before.

Me: I made it up for the heck of it.

Oh, well, no I don't think so. –laughs-

**Momo x Appa**

-laughs- A Lemur and a ten-ton flying bison? No, funny though.

**Crazy Insane Herb Lady x King Bumi **

I could see that! -laughs-

**Aang x Staff**

Okay, you're just weird now.

**Aang x Momo**

Uhhh…

**Aang x Appa**

-cough-

**Now, onto slash.**

Slash?

**Sokka x Zuko**

As in—? -pretends to puke-

**Jet x Sokka**

Ewww…

**Aang x Zuko**

-really throws up this time-

Janitor: AW MAN! I JUST HAD THE FLOOR WAXED! -gets bucket and mop out-

-runs to find a bathroom to go throw up in again-

Me: Well, we've scared off another host, two down everyone else to go!

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Ok! Well that's it for now! Review! Or else face my fury! RAWR!

–coughs- Uhm yeah, just review.

-Kat


	3. Katara's Ship Show

Sorry it's been so long! I'm sorry! But now I'm back with Katara's chapter…she was a spot of trouble I must say ;). Thanks so much to my reviewers, xXxEndangeredSpeciesxXx, Ninja Hotaru, Fire Saber and mistressugarstars! Important! All right since I forgot a few pairings I'm going to make a list of all the pairings I missed and make a master list with all the characters reactions at the end…it sounds kinda confusing but it'll work out. So if your ship or any other crazy whack ship (slash included) you'd like to see the Avatar cast responds to let me know in your review. Also, if there is any other characters you'd like to see on the show let me know, right now for sure I have Zuko next, then Toph.

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**Disclaimer: **I don't own Avatar, I'm just a teenager sitting at her laptop thinking strange things and typing them out…

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**Katara's Ship Show**

Hello, everyone, I suppose you're waiting for me to tell you what I think of your so-called 'ships' so I suppose I'll go ahead and get started. First ship please!

**Katara x Aang**

Uh…

Me: Don't worry! No one will see this I swear!

Aang: -from back room- Wait, what channel again?

Me: Channel 1,094! But shut up, Katara thinks no one's watching!

Aang: Okay! -the rest of the cast of Avatar settles in to watch-

Me: Okay, Katara, go ahead!

Katara: -returns from being distracted conveniently- Okay, are you sure Aang isn't watching?

Me: Cross my heart, hope to die! -crosses fingers-

Okay, I definitely hope this will happen, I know I feel we should be together forever and I hope Aang feels the same.

Audience: Awwww!

Me: Who let you in?

Audience: -points to producer-

Me: Your fired.

Producer: -starts to cry-

Me: Pull it together.

Katara: -cough- Next ship please!

**Zuko x Katara**

What!

Me: A lot of people think it will happen.

WELL YOU PEOPLE ARE DEAD WRONG! I cannot believe you would think I would want to even think about loving that—that—

Me: Okay, we get that you disapprove the ship.

Disapprove? _Disapprove? DISAPPROVE!_

Me: AANG! GET IN HERE AND CALM DOWN YOUR GIRLFRIEND!

Katara and Aang: What?

Me: GIRL WHO IS A FRIEND! JUST HELP ME!

Aang: -calms down Katara-

Me: -phew-

**Sokka x Yue**

Sokka was good to her, which would have been nice to see them together.

**Toph x Aang**

OH MY GOD IS AANG CHEATING ON ME FOR TOPH! I CANNOT BELIEVE—

Me: WE DIDN'T SAY IT HAPPENED! PLEASE DON'T GET MAD AGAIN!

Aang: -encouraging smile-

**Sokka x Suki**

I like Suki, I could definitely handle that couple.

**Aang x Meng**

Oh, I hated Meng. She was so annoying and she called me floozy! Oh I heard it all right! Clear as day!

Me: QUICK NEXT SHIP!

**Sokka x Azula**

Sokka? Azula? What kind of nuthouse is this!

**Katara x Haru**

Don't get me wrong I like the guy…

Aang: -growl-

…but only as a friend, not as anything else.

Aang: -satisfied-

**Zuko x Mai**

Mai…Mai…I know it from somewhere…oh! One of those girls that's with Azula? The one with the black hair? Okay, I could probably see that.

**Katara x Jet**

What makes you think I would want to be with that JERK anymore? -scoff-

**Sokka x Toph**

Sokka and Toph? You've got to be joking me she's twelve and he's fifteen, well I suppose Aang and I are two years apart but still, Sokka and Toph hmm, I don't think so.

**Momo x Appa**

That's an interesting combo and we'll leave it at that.

**Katara x Momo**

Okay, I think he's cute in a newborn baby kind of cuddly sort of fuzzy cute.

**Katara x Appa**

What? You are suggesting me a ten-ton bison getting it on? You people are sickening and disgusting, why did I agree to the show anyway?

**Moving on to slash.**

Oh this sounds bad.

**Sokka x Aang**

Excuse me?

**Aang x Zuko**

What are you suggesting!

**Katara x Toph**

WHAT! Are you mad? ARE YOU PEOPLE CRAZY? WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH YOU? YOU ALL NEED STRAIGHT JACKETS AND BE PUT INTO ASYLUMS!

-starts to destroy things-

Me: HEY! That costs a lot of money! Stop! No! Not the—! Okay, there go the cameras. SECURITY! GET HER OFF OF THE STAGE!

-while being dragged off- YOU PEOPLE ARE SICK CRUEL PEOPLE! WHY DO YOU LIKE TO TORTURE PEOPLE THIS WAY?

Well we made two run off scarred for life and we made one so angry she destroyed the whole set! Tune in next update for Zuko's chapter!

Zuko: Oh, no you're not roping me into this; you saw what it did to the water peasant girl!

Me: I have my ways…

Zuko: I have a bad feeling about this…


	4. Deleted Scenes

Hey guys! Thanks for all of the reviews…thanks so much to, causeimbored, Dragongal150, mistresssugarstars, Emma, Piper Aurora Potter, Remember Yue and conspiredfate! Okay, Iroh goes onto the list of people for the show. I'll dedicate that show to Mako who was the voice of Iroh, since he died last Friday, as I'm sure you have all heard –moment of silence-. Moving onto a happier note, this week's show isn't a normal show…keep reading to find out…

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**Disclaimer: ** I don't own Avatar or anything relating to it…as I'm sure you know because I wouldn't be writing this.

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**Me:** HEY! Aang, Katara, Sokka! We're delaying Zuko's episode—

**Zuko: **PHEW!

**Me: **—but that doesn't mean we have SKIPPED IT!

**Zuko: -**has scared look on face-

**Me: **Anyway, we forgot some cards in the last segments! So listen up we'll start with Sokka, then Aang and then Katara. Okay, one of the pairings that everyone wants to see your reactions on is Sokka x Ty Lee. Sokka goes first.

**Sokka: **Ty Lee? The gymnast girl? One of the Danerous Ladies? No way! I already told you guys, my heart belongs to Yue! And if there is anyone _living _your going to pair me up with it'll be Suki. End of Story.

**Aang:** Yeah, I don't think Sokka's going to be with anyone that's with the Fire Nation. Yue was the right one for him.

**Sokka: **-nods-

**Katara: **You know they might make a cute couple… -teasing-

**Sokka: **WHAT?

**Katara: **As a matter of fact…HEY TY LEE!

**Ty Lee: **Yes?

**Katara: **How would you like to have dinner with Sokka tomorrow night?

**Sokka: **-jaw drops-

**Ty Lee: **Is he the cute one with the little ponytail?

**Katara: **-looks at Sokka smugly- Yep!

**Ty Lee: **Count me in! –walks away—

**Sokka: **KATARA WHAT WAS THAT FOR?

**Me: **You know she's been in a bad mood ever since the show; this might be a side effect of her anger…

**Sokka: **-explodes in anger-

**Me: **Don't leave yet, we've still got another few pairings…

**Sokka: **-evil look- All right, but I'll be right back! -runs off- -Jet comes in from nowhere- -to Jet- Jet, Katara has fallen madly in love with you and wants to go to dinner with you tomorrow night. We'll make it a _double date._

**Jet: **Okay, cool. See you then Katara. –walks off-

**Katara: **SOKKA!

**Sokka: **Now we're even. –smug look-

**Me: **Okay, now our next pairing is…Azula x Zhao.

**Sokka: **-blank expression- -starts to laugh- -falls to the floor laughing- -the only audible thing is '…could see them in a closet making out…' while the rest is inaudible because of laughter-

**Me: **Okay…Aang your turn.

**Aang: **-is also on the floor with Sokka laughing the only audible thing from him is '…cute couple…' as he starts laughing harder-

**Katara: **-looks strangely at the floor with the two boys laughing- I on the other hand find it quite disturbing and not _funny._ He's what mid-forties and she's fifteen? Isn't that _illegal?_

**Me **and **Katara: **-waits for the two to stop laughing before continuing-

**Aang **and **Sokka: **-wipes tears and stands up again-

**Me: **Okay, last one Iroh x Jun.

**All three: **-blank confused stares-

**Me: **Okay, Iroh is Zuko's uncle you know that correct.

**All three: **-nods-

**Me: **Jun was the bounty hunter that was after you in the abbey where you found Bato.

**Sokka **and **Aang: **-are both on the floor laughing again-

**Katara: **-rolls eyes- Yet again that's illegal, he's an old man, probably sixties, and she's a little older than Zuko…that is wrong!

**Me: **Alright! If anyone has any more odd strange couplings you'd like to see (they don't have to have fan fictions to be ships you know) let me know in the reviews. From now on I will be including these ships. See you next week… I'm not sure what to do, what do you guys want to see? LET'S ASK THE AUDIENCE! Next week should I:

A. Write the double date.

B. Skip the double date and go onto Zuko's week.

**Zuko: **A! A! A!

**Me: **Be quiet, you aren't eligible for voting.

**Zuko: **Please vote A! Better yet how about choice C? Not do Zuko's week AT ALL?

**Me: **Don't make me get Azula over here.

**Zuko: **-is silent but making the letter a with his fingers-


	5. Zuko's Ship Show

**Me: **Hello everyone and thanks to my reviewers mistresssugarstars, Green Earth PFC, Corzova, Brix, 7Katara7, Liselle129, Dragongal150, Supergirrl, the pink kitty, Emma, AangKataraForever, LORD-BIG-DOGGIE, and This Is My Pen Name DEAL! Okay everyone gather round the results are in and…

**Zuko: **-crosses fingers-

**Me: **The winner is B! So it looks like you're up Zuko.

**Zuko: **-gets out fire daggers and heads towards reviewers-

**Me: **And no, you can attack the reviewers.

**Zuko: **-looks disappointed-

**Me: **So get into the hot seat, it's your turn!

**Zuko: **-looks like a deer stuck in the headlights-

**Me: **-sighs- -grabs collar and drags him onto stage- Okay, let's get the show going!

-nothing happens- -Zuko is trying to get away-

**Me: **-while tying up Zuko so he doesn't escape- HELLO? I said let's GO!

-nothing- -Zuko is with a nail file trying to break free-

**Me: **Why is nothing happening –using shackles to keep Zuko in the chair-

**Random Audience Member: **Uh, you fired the producer…he was the one who held up the cards with the ship on them.

**Me: **Riiggghhhhttt…heh, okay then um, Aang you can hold the cards until we get a new producer.

**Aang: **OKAY!

**Me: **Okay go.

**Aang: **-holds up first card- **Aang x Katara**

**Zuko: **-refuses to answer-

**Me: **Look, the faster you answer these the faster you can get out of here, and then you can burn everyone to a crisp.

**Zuko: **Okay, sounds good to me.

**Me:** Okay so back to the ship, **Aang x Katara**

**Zuko: **Sure.

**Me: **More detail…or I _will_ get Azula over here.

**Zuko: **-is scared- Um, okay, the Avatar and the Waterbender, everyone else says so, so yes, I guess. Ha, I rhymed.

Zuko x Katara 

**Zuko: **Excuse me? EXCUSE ME? You think I would want to love _her. _ –points to Katara- No way, you couldn't pay me enough.

Sokka x Yue 

**Zuko: **Wait…she was that Water Princess right? He's a peasant; she'd be way to good for him.

**Sokka: **-growls- -throws boomerang- -gets stopped by Katara-

Aang x Toph 

**Zuko: **Okay…the Avatar and the blind girl with them? They are the same age right? So, that would work.

Sokka x Suki 

**Zuko: **Sorry? Who's Suki?

**Me: **Oh right, you don't know some of these people, Aang go ahead and take out the ones he doesn't know.

**Aang: **-starts to take cards out but they are too big to handle and they fly all over the place-

**Me: **Ugh, let me help you. –Takes out all the ships Zuko doesn't know and stacks them again- here. –Hands him cards-

**aluzA x akkoS**

**Zuko: **-stares confused-

**Me: **Psst, Aang! You have them upside down.

**Aang: **Oh! -chuckles as he turns them around-

Sokka x Azula 

**Zuko: **Ha. Ha! Ha! -starts laughing harder- My sister and that Water Tribe Peasant! Yeah…I could see _that._ –sarcastic-

Zuko x Mai 

**Zuko: **Wait; Mai is Azula's friend. Oh yeah! She was the one I had to knock an apple off of her head and save her from Azula. YOU KNOW I STILL HATE YOU FOR THAT!

**Azula: **YOU HATE ME FOR EVERYTHING WHAT DOES IT MATTER?

**Zuko: **Anyway, I always thought she had a crush on me, I don't know. It would be weird.

Sokka x Toph 

**Zuko: **Eh, I couldn't see that.

Sokka x Ty Lee 

The peasant and Azula's gymnast friend? Where do you people get this stuff? It's weird and deranged.

Azula x Zhao 

**Zuko: **WTF! My sister and Admiral Monkeyface? HA! I can tease her for this for weeks on end! -rubs hands together-

Iroh x Jun 

**Zuko: **My Uncle and that bounty hunter? Okay, no. I know Uncle was totally hitting on her but it was just wrong! Yeah…no.

**Me: **When have you have you ever said totally?

**Zuko: **Since you typed it five seconds ago.

**Me: **Oh…righhtttt…

Zuko x Ponytail 

**Zuko: **-eye twitch- Why would I be in love with my hair?

Zuko x Fan girl 

**Zuko **Fan girl?

**Me: **-opens up blinds- -a bunch of girls with tee shirts on with Zuko's face on them and posters that say OMFG I LOVE YOU ZUKO!-

**Random Fan Girl: **OMG LOOK IT'S ZUKO! -screams and faints-

**All Fan Girls: **-screams and tries to break through window to get to Zuko-

**Random Fan Girl #2: **WHY DID YOU CUT OFF YOUR BEAUTIFUL HAIR? BUT I STILL LOVE YOU!

**Zuko: **That's disturbing. Wait…you aren't a crazed fan girl are you?

**Me: **You mean stalking you and thinking you are the sexiest thing alive? Uh, no. Unlike them, I like your hair better that way than with the ponytail. But that still doesn't mean I think you're hot.

**Mob of Fan Girls: **OMG HOW DARE YOU! ZUKO IS THE HOTTEST THING ON THIS PLANET AND IS SO SEXY AND SO WAS HIS PONY TAIL! GET HER GIRLS!

**Me: **-gets attacked and beaten into a bloody pulp-

**Everyone: **-stares-

**Aang: **Should we get some help?

**Sokka: **Just leave her there; we'll get help after the show.

**Zuko: **Wow, that was disturbing. I never thought I'd have fan girls after me.

Slash Pairings Sokka x Aang 

**Zuko:** Okay, I said it was okay for the Avatar to be with the Waterbender not her brother…that's disturbing.

Sokka x Zuko 

**Zuko: **ARE YOU SUGGESTING I'M GAY?

Zuko x Aang 

**Zuko: **THAT IS SO WRONG! I'M SEVENTEEN AND THE AVATAR IS TWELVE AND I'M-NOT-GAY! –starts burning everything- -sprinklers come on- -everyone except for Zuko and unconscious me evacuates the building-

**Me: **-hours later I wake up in a burning building- Oh, no, Zuko saw the slash pairings!

**Fireman: **-comes and gets me and shoots the hose water at Zuko to put him out- Wow, those are some pretty bad injuries from this fire.

**Me: **Oh, no they weren't from the fire they were from fan girls.

**Fireman: **Okay then.

**0o0o0o0**

There's Zuzu's chapter! I'm sorry to any of you Zuko fan girls out there, I just couldn't pass up the chance. And yes you read right, I do not think Zuko is sexy or hot or whatever you guys think of him as

–gets ready for the tomatoes to be thrown- -sigh- I might add some more deleted scenes of the double date later.

-Kat


	6. Back In Time

**Me: **-has bandages on body- Hey everyone! Thanks for the patience! Okay, I really wanted to do the double date so I'm going to go back and do it. All you other Harry Potter fans get out your Time Turners! -goes back in time-

The other night…

**Katara **and** Sokka:** -walking towards set table with food-

**Katara:** I can't believe we're doing this.

**Sokka: **If you hadn't told Ty Lee to go on a date with _me_ we wouldn't be in this mess now would we? –takes a seat as Jet and Ty Lee sit down- -starts eating without saying hello to his date-

**Katara: **-looks up uneasily-

**Jet: **-smiling in a 'cool' way at her-

**Katara: -**returns gaze to food-

**Ty Lee: **Hiiiii, Sokka! –grins-

**Sokka: **-mouth full of food- Hey. –starts eating again-

Azula walks in.

**Azula: **WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR DOING TY LEE?

**Jet: **-looks up- Screw you Katara, she's way hotter than you'll ever be!

**Katara: **She's Fire Nation Royalty.

**Jet: **Smokin' hott Fire Nation Royalty.

**Katara: **Aren't you supposed to be _against_ the Fire Nation?

**Jet: **Not anymore! -gets up- -to Azula- Hey, I'm Jet.

**Azula: **Get away from me you peasant.

**Jet: **I'm not a peasant, I'm in love.

**Azula: **Get away from me or I'm calling security.

**Jet: **You must be a Heartbender because you just bended my heart.

**Azula: **SECURITY!

**Jet: **-being dragged away by security- I'LL FIND YOU AGAIN SOMEDAY!

**Azula: **-mutters- Stalker. –normal voice- Come, Ty Lee we have no time for this.

**Ty Lee: **Azula, I'd like to take my vacation now.

**Azula: -**looks at clock- -waits 3 sec- Okay, your vacations up.

**Sokka: **-looking pleadingly to Azula to take her away-

**Azula: **Hm, you _want _me to take your date away?

**Sokka: **-nods vigorously- -Ty Lee turns to him- No! I don't know what she's talking about!

**Azula: **I enjoy watching torture. Carry on. –claps hands-

Hand servants rush out and gives her a royal chair.

**Azula: **-sits down and watches-

**Ty Lee: **-isn't eating- -looks at Sokka with big eyes-

**Sokka: **-Is looking uncomfortable- I got to go to the bathroom!

**Azula, Katara, Ty Lee: **-waits for five minutes-

**Azula: **He's taking too long. Go find my torture source!

**Foot Servants: **-run off to find Sokka-

**Sokka: **-clinging to various things- NOOO YOU CAN'T TAKE ME ALIVVVEEEEE!

**Katara: **Well, this is boring. See ya'll later.

**Sokka: **-stops screaming- -is stunned while servants carry him back- Did…did you just…just say YA'LL? –laughs-

**Ty Lee: -**suggestively- Now we're all alone…

**Sokka: **No were not! She's here!

**Azula: **Just ignore me. –evil glare-

**Ty Lee: **-giggles- -moves closer-

Hey keep it PG over there!

**Sokka: **KATARA! HELP ME!

Alright…that's all the time we have for now –gets sucked back to present- Next week Toph!


	7. Toph's Ship Show

Hello and welcome to Ship Shows! Since I forgot to thank reviewers from the last chapter here's a thanks to everyone! Thanks to softballgirl9411, LORD-BIG-DOGGIE, Corzova, This Is My Pen Name DEAL, FiregirlJadea, pokepsycho, madCello12, Spirit and Soul 3, Absesed, avatarkataang, frozenheat, Brix, and Hydromaniac.

Previously we had Zuko on the show and he destroyed everything. But now the set is repaired and hopefully our next guests are less violent…anyway, today on the show…TOPH!

**Audience: -**Applauds-

**Toph: **-reluctantly sits in the 'hot seat'-

Alright, and we'll have Katara announcing the ships for Toph, since she is blind and we won't have that many ships since Toph has only recently joined the group and doesn't know half the people we pair. Savvy?

**Audience: **-nods-

Got it, Toph?

**Toph: **-nods while crossing her arms-

Okay, Katara go ahead.

**Katara: **All right, the first pairing is Aang and I. –blushes-

**Toph: **-laughs- Yeah, you and Aang are practically together aren't you? When I first joined, I thought you were.

**Katara: **Okay, -blushing harder- the next one is Zuko and I –tone of disapproving-.

**Toph: **The guys who's following us? Or in Sokka's words 'the angry freak with a ponytail'? –Laughs- I don't think so.

**Katara: **The next one is Aang and you.

**Toph: **Me with Aang? Nah, besides Aang is yours anyway.

**Katara: **-blushes- Good, okay, the next one is…Sokka and Azula.

**Toph: **Lightening girl, right? Again in Sokka's words one of the 'Dangerous Ladies'? That'll be the day…

**Katara: **-laughs- The next one is you and Sokka.

**Toph: **Me and Sokka? -laughs- He's someone to hang out with not to have a relationship with.

**Katara: **Alright, then there's Sokka and Ty Lee.

**Toph: **Another 'Dangerous Lady'? No.

**Katara: **They did go on a date the other night…-laughs-

**Toph: **Oh really? That changes everything…

**Sokka: **AGAINST MY OWN WILL!

**Toph: **Okay, Snoozles whatever you say.

**Sokka: **I SWEAR!

**Toph: **Uh huh, all right continue.

**Katara: **Okay, here's a new one that was suggested, you and Teo. Wait, you don't know Teo...

**Toph: **Who's Teo? HOW CAN YOU PAIR ME WITH SOMEONE I DON'T EVEN KNOW?

**Katara:** I don't know, people are strange Toph. Okay, the next one is errr…these are the slash ones…you might want to brace yourself.

**Toph: **I can handle anything!

**Katara: **-flips page- -gulp- you and me.

**Toph: **ANYTHING BUT THAT! I'M OUTTA HERE! -storms off-

**Katara: **-comes up to me- You are the sickest minded person I have ever met!

**Me: **IT'S NOT ME! It's the other people who come up with these ships! It's my job to write them down for your reactions.

**Katara: **HERE'S MY REACTION! –slaps-

**Me: **-whacks upside the head with one of my crutches-

**Katara: **-out cold-

**Me: **Paramedics! -while Katara is being put on a stretcher- Well, nothing was destroyed this show…that's good. But I've made enemies with everyone, but OH WELL! All for the good of my reviewers. See ya next week!

-Kat


	8. Interviews all around!

**Me: **Hey guys, we're back! Sorry, for not updating for a while. So, wow, how bout the premiere of 'Secret of the Fire Nation'?

**Everyone: **-assorted comments mumbled-

**Me: **Besides being the greatest episode ever, it has turned the shipping world upside down. Well, not really, but there's some shippy stuff going on in there. And I'm here with the Avatar cast to discuss it. First, the biggest thing going on here was Aang and Katara's talk about their feelings…well, Aang did the talking. You want to share about that?

**Aang: **-blushes- Yeah, well…um…we weren't the most important…Sokka and Suki are more interesting if your talking relationships…

**Me: **We'll talk to them, but we're interviewing you two right now.

**Katara: **Well, I was so glad that Aang told me, and now he's not so secluded, -to Aang- I was really worried about you for a bit.

**Aang: **Yeah…but when I saw that happy family I knew that I wanted to have a family like that with you –blushes-.

**Me: **1…2…3…Awww!

**Audience: **Awww!

**Me: **So we saw Sokka and Suki kiss…a lot. Will we see you kissing anytime soon?

**Aang **and** Katara: **-blushes and mumbles different things-

**Me: **I'll take that as a yes. Okay, moving onto our next couple that was affected by 'Secret of the Fire Nation'. Sokka and Suki!

**Audience: **-cheers-

**Sokka and Suki: **-waves-

**Me: **Okay, so Suki we got to see you again. Tell us how you felt about the reunion after not seeing each other since the third episode.

**Suki: **I could hardly believe it was really Sokka, but I knew it was him.

**Sokka: **Yeah, I figured that out after you kissed me…a random security guard wouldn't go around kissing people.

**Me: **So we saw Suki without your warrior's makeup for the first part…

**Sokka: **That's why I didn't notice you because you didn't have your makeup on!

**Me: **And then Suki came with you across the Serpent's Pass and Sokka was overprotective of Suki who was trying to protect Sokka, and you guys went on a moonlit walk where Sokka was being stupid…

**Sokka: **Hey!

**Me: **…and then you guys almost kissed. So how are you dealing with your loss and Suki, Sokka?

**Sokka: **Well, erm, it's really hard, but I know, Princess Yue wouldn't want me to be sad for too long and would want me to move on.

**Me: **…and Suki, how do you feel, knowing Sokka's loved someone else?

**Suki: **Well, I can't blame him, when he left Kyoshi I never thought I'd see him again and he must have thought the same. We went our separate ways, led our own lives. But our path's crossed again, but I had to leave again.

**Me: **Before we go there, how about that kiss? Suki was apologizing and Sokka stopped her with a kiss. How did it feel?

**Suki: **Honestly, Sokka isn't a bad kisser.

**Sokka: **Same to you.

**Me: **All right, and then Suki left, do you think your paths will cross again…other than seeing each other on the show here.

**Sokka: **As soon as this war is over I'm going back to find her.

**Suki: **I'll be waiting –smiles-.

**Me: **Okay now let's just talk Sokka here. Sokka how does it feel to be a chick magnet…first was Suki, then Yue, and then Toph, and then Ty Lee. Obviously, 'you and Suki' is the dominant ship here followed by you and Yue. But also, Toph and Ty Lee are also battling for your attention. What do you think about it? From the episode, you didn't seem to mind Ty Lee crushing on you, but I think you kind of ignored Toph.

**Sokka: **Well, first, I still chose Suki out of them all, excluding Yue because she died. Ty Lee, hey, she ain't bad looking. Toph liking me, this is news would you care to explain?

**Suki: **I will, when I went to go save her she thought it was you and kissed me.

**Sokka: **Really? –looks over in Toph's direction-

**Toph: **-glares at me- -sarcastic- Thanks for keeping my secret!

**Sokka: **Hmmm…

**Me: **So, thinking back to previous shows here, Sokka you didn't like the 'you and Ty Lee' ship. So has your opinion changed then?

**Sokka: **Well, I dunno. I don't mind the thought of it now, like I said she's pretty cute, but I'm still going with Suki.

**Me: **So…was the whole double date act a show or your real reaction?

**Sokka: **Well, actually you wrote it that way, I had no choice.

**Me: **Okay, wise guy. I hadn't seen Secret of the Fire Nation then and I had no idea you'd be okay with Ty Lee drooling all over you. Okay, I think that does it for you two. Now over to Katara.

**Katara: **What? I already answered your questions about Aang.

**Me: **This isn't about you and Aang, this is just another interview talking about past relationships.

**Katara: **Fine let's get this over with.

**Me: **Okay, so as the record goes you've attracted as many as Sokka. Aang, Haru, Jet and Teo.

**Katara: **Is Teo really counted as someone 'I've attracted' or whatever the heck you said?

**Me: **Just go with it. So you and Aang are pretty stable then, we've already settled that. Haru we've only seen once, will we see him again?

**Katara: **Maybe, not as a boyfriend though, he was just a nice friend.

**Me: **Jet. We've all hated him. But now he's traveling to Ba-Sing-Se as a 'second chance' and he'll probably run into 'Team Avatar'.

**Katara: -**yells- What the hell? Jet's back? That's a load of crap as a 'second chance.' Please don't let us see him. And please don't say 'Team Avatar'. It was annoying enough when Sokka said it.

**Me: **Katara! We're trying to keep it PG...

**Katara: **Sorry...but I just CAN'T STAND HIM!

**Me: **Well it looks like _everyone_ is annoyed with Jet. Zuko looked pretty annoyed when Jet wanted to talk to him about becoming a freedom fighter.

**Katara:** -laughs out loud- Jet asked _Zuko_, the _prince_ of the _Fire Nation_ to be a _freedom fighter_? What did Zuko say?

**Me: **No, of course. And wow I think the biggest use of italics in one sentence award goes to Katara. Hey, there's an idea we can start an award show!

**Katara: **You're very easily distracted…

**Me: **I know…meanwhile in the world of shipping a new ship has been born! LongshotxSmellerbee! I'm wondering how many fan fictions we'll see about that pairing. Well, it looks like that's all for today! Tune in next time for 'Ship Shows' where I'm looking at getting a member of the Fire Nation Royalty. But I could be fried to a crisp before I even get around to asking Ozai. Azula's seen the torture on the show already; I don't know how to convince her. Iroh, I probably can get easier. See you all next week!

-Kat


	9. Interviews with Fire Nation Royalty

**Me: **Hello, all! This week we're all very honored to have the Royal Fire Nation Family, General Iroh, Fire Lord Ozai and Princess Azula!

**Zuko: **What the hell did you do to them to get them to come?

**Me: **I promised them large amounts of gold and domination of the show.

**Zuko: **This is your show!

**Me: **-whispers- I'm not really going to, but I am giving them money.

**Zuko: **I didn't get money!

**Me: **That's because you were to easily taken hostage, if I did that to your father or sister I wouldn't be here right now.

**Zuko: **-crosses arms- If I'd had my dao swords… -threatening glare-

**Me: **-pulls at collar- But that's why security took them away from you. Okay, so please welcome Fire Lord Ozai!

**Audience of Fire Nation citizens: **YAY!

**Me: **Princess Azula!

**Audience OFNC: **YAY!

**Me: **General Iroh!

**Audience OFNC: **…

**Me: **YAY!

**Section of 'Tea Lovers of the Fire Nation': **YAY!

**Me: **C'mon Zuko! 'YAY!' with us!

**Zuko: **Yay…-waves finger around in circle in a whoopity sarcastic way-

**Me: **Okay with the Fire Nation Royalty here, this should prove to be a great show! Long _long _show, but a great show! But…before we go anywhere…Zuko!

**Zuko: **What do you want? –pulls at collar, knowing what I want-

**Me:** You had a little date in Ba Sing Se…someone bring a chair up here for Zuko's interview real quick!

**Ozai: **My son dated a lowly Earth Kingdom girl? Well I suppose they _are_ both worthless.

**Producer: **-brings up chair-

**Me:** Now, Zuko, _sit._

**Zuko: **-sits-

**Azula: **How'd you train him so well? –haughty glare-

**Me: **So you had a wonderful date, blew it all and Jin still wanted you.

**Zuko: **Thanks for the support.

**Me:** You told her you were in a _traveling circus_ and you offered her a coupon before you were about to kiss. Let me tell you, you are one strange little man.

**Zuko: **That's copyrighted Pixar! You can't use that line!

**Me: **Since when do you watch 'Toy Story'?

**Azula: **Wow, Zuzu, from what I'm hearing you aren't too smooth with the ladies are you?

**Zuko: **SHUT UP! –sulks-

**Me: **So Jin must be pretty special for you to risk your identity in Ba Sing Se as a Firebender to make her happy.

**Zuko: **-mumbles incoherently-

**Me: **Out of it all you got a kiss and you ran away, but all in all you had a nice night, right?

**Zuko: **-mumbles more while nodding head-

**Mai:** -storms in- YOU—HAD—A—DATE—WITH—ANOTHER—_EARTH KINGDOM_—GIRL? –cries- I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIALLLLLLLL! -runs off-

**Zuko: **WE NEVER HAD _ANYTHING! _

**Me: **Well, that was odd. Okay, your dismissed Zuko. You may want to go cheer up your girlfriend.

**Zuko: **SHE'S NOT MY GIRLFRIEND!

**Me: **Whatever.

**Zuko: **-sulks off-

**Me: **-whispers to him- Mai went thatta way! –points-

**Zuko: **I'm not going to find Mai; I'm going to go kill myself now.

**Azula: **Oh, I'll help!

**Fangirls: **NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

**Zuko: **Sheesh, relax, I was only joking. –mumbles- Even if I do feel suicidal.

**Me: **Okay, then! Now back to our Royalty. Let's start off with the rules since we have three people on the show instead of one. Aang has decided he wanted to help hold up cards this week so Aang'll hold up a card like so…-Aang holds up card- and then Fire Lord Ozai will reply first, followed by Azula, and then Iroh. Savvy?

**Random Pirates of the Caribbean Fans in the Audience: **YAY!

**Ozai, Azula and Iroh: **Okay.

**Me: **FIRST CARD!

**Aang: **-holds up card-

**Aang x Katara**

**Me: **Okay Fire Lord, go ahead.

**Ozai: **Uh…who are Katara and Aang?

**Me:** -facepalm- Okay, Aang is the Avatar and the one currently holding up the sign. 

**Aang: **-waves- -drops cards while waving-

**Sokka and me: **-facepalm-

**Me: **And Katara is his friend, where'd she go?

**Sokka: **I believe she's filing for a case against this show.

**Me: **Great.

**Ozai: **…

**Me: **So do you know who is traveling with the Avatar?

**Ozai: **…

**Me: **Did you even know what the Avatar looked like before the show?

**Ozai: **Well I did have the wanted posters—

**Me: **DO YOU KNOW ANYTHING?

**Ozai: **-flames rise around him-

**Me: **-cowers- I'm sorry! I didn't mean it like that! NO DON'T GIVE ME A HORRIFIC SCAR LIKE ZUKO'S.

**Zuko: **ARE YOU CALLING ME FAT?

**Ozai: **-flames die down…a little-

**Me: **We'll pass this one on to Azula. You know who were talking about right? The Avatar and the Waterbender?

**Azula: **Yes, I'm well aware of the Avatar's companions, and I'm sure they'd make a nice couple.

**Me: **Okay. –is relieved I haven't been burned to a crisp yet and Azula is cooperating- General Iroh, go ahead.

**Iroh: **Well, I shouldn't be the one to judge; I haven't observed their relationship. I have no idea if they would be a couple or not.

**Me: **That's a fair enough answer. Next!

**Zuko x Katara**

**Ozai:** Well, since I have no idea who this 'Katara' is I have no idea whether my son deserves her or not. Probably not.

**Azula: **My brother and that Waterbender b—

**Me: **KEEP IT PG HERE, WOMAN!

**Azula: **It'll never happen.

**Iroh: **I can assure everyone out there my nephew has no feelings for the Waterbender.

**Me: **Okay, next!

**Toph x Aang**

**Ozai: **Why did you even bring me here if I don't know any of these people?

**Me: **Because we expected you to do your research and know who the Avatar was traveling with, SO YOU WOULD KNOW!

**Azula: **I know who they are, the Earthbender girl and the Avatar. They are the same age; that could be a possibility.

**Iroh: **I'll concur with Azula.

**Sokka x Azula**

**Azula: **Excuse me?

**Me: **-plays with thumbs-

**Azula: **EXCUSE ME? AM I READING CORRECTLY? -flames rise up around her-

**Me: **I-I can see wh-where sh-she gets her t-t-temper! –smiles nervously-

**Azula: **-almost her whole body is on fire as she heads towards Aang holding the cards-

**Aang: **-eyes widen- -cowers-

**Me: **RUN! AANG! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! –takes cover under chair-

**Aang:** -drops cards- -runs and hides behind Katara- 

**Azula: **-takes the card and burns it to ashes- -cools off and sits back down-

**Me: **Heh…heh…NEXT!

**Aang: **-gets back to cards and dusts the ashes off of the remaining cards-

**Zuko x Mai**

**Azula: **HAHA! HELL YEAH!

**Me:** AZULA! PG! –sighs- Eh, what the heck.

**Ozai: **How has he attracted even a single girl? He's worthless coward!

**Me: **If that's what you truly think…let's look behind door number one. –opens curtains revealing large group of fangirls-

**Fan Girl: **HE THINKS ZUKO'S WORTHLESS! Well he did give him his sexy scar…but GET HIM! -attacks Ozai-

**Me: **-gets out cell phone and dials 911- Yes, we need an ambulance. Fire Lord Ozai is being attacked by fan girls. Thank you.

**Azula and Iroh: **-backing away slowly-

-SWAT team arrives followed by paramedics- -SWAT team takes down fan girls (not without a fight) and paramedics take Ozai away on a stretcher-

**Me: **-Ahem- NEXT!

**Sokka x Ty Lee**

**Azula: **Mai did tell me Ty Lee had a crush on the peasant…I have no idea why.

**Iroh: **I don't know, I don't know why you have _me_ on the show; I don't know anything about these relationships!

**Me: **How about this one, Iroh?

**Iroh x Jun**

**Iroh: **-chuckles- Okay, okay. You got me, yes, yes. Next card.

**Azula x Zhao**

**Me: **NO! AANG NEXT CARD! _NEXT CARD!_

**Aang: **Huh?

**Azula: **-eyes widen in rage- -body is engulfed in flames again-

**Me: **Too late. –facepalm- RUN FOR YOUR LIFE…again.

**Aang: **-hides behind Katara again-

**Azula: **-burns card- -proceeds with burning entire set and building-

**Me: **NOT AGAIN! EVERYONE OUT OF THE BUILDING! We'll see you all next week! AHH! –runs out-


	10. Interesting Interviews

**Me: **Okay, I know we haven't done the show but that's because we were rebuilding and there hasn't been an episode in a while...in a while but this episode this week was surprising with a bunch of stuff. First let's start with…NO! –sobs-

**Aang: **What's wrong? We found Appa!

**Me: **JET DIED! Well, he was dying when you guys left him and I'm sure we won't be seeing anymore of him. AND ZUKO GAVE UP THE BLUE SPIRIT!

**Everyone: **-gasp- Zuko was the Blue Spirit?

**Aang: **Yeah, yeah, so he gave it up? But _you're _so sad Jet died when you were worried he was going to interfere with Katara's relationship with me?

**Me: **Yeah, but I just realized…now Jetzula can't happen! -sobs-

**Katara: **You're weird.

**Me: **I know. Okay, let's talk. It all started with Jet…Sokka suggested Katara kiss Jet! And Aang snapped back that was a bad idea.

**Aang: **Yeah! It was! –crosses arms-

**Me: **-raises eyebrows- That's what I thought. Let's see…-shuffles through show notes- No more shippy stuff but till the end. You guys found Appa!! Momo how does it feel to have Appa back, for all the Moappa fans? Appa how does it feel to be back?

**Momo: **-chatters-

**Appa: -**groans-

**Me: **I'll take that as a 'Good to be back.' Okay and also, Katara you were scaring me at the end when you were _so_ sad at the end when Jet died.

**Katara: **Well, he died. It's normal for someone to mourn for someone who just died, especially when Jet was just turning good.

**Me: **You won't be missing him as a boyfriend though?

**Katara: **No, as a good friend.

**Me: **And of course Aang you were always there for you.

**Aang: **-smiles sadly- I'm sorry.

**Katara: **-shakes her head- It's okay, Aang.

**Aang: **-gives her a hug-

**Me: **Awww! –cough- Um, well I think that's it, that was a short show! Oh, before we go ZUKO YOU BETTER GET YOUR BUTT HELPING AANG BY THE SEASON FINALE! That'll be all.

**Zuko: **-stares-

**Me: **See you all later!


	11. The Wrath of Aang

**Me: **Yes! We are back in business!

**Sokka: **Spirits you haven't updated this in forever!

**Me: **Yes, shame on me! I feel so horrible! But I was really busy and I was really sick in between there when new episodes were on…I was in the hospital around that time…and then as soon as I got better and new episodes came on I got all wrapped up in my OTHER fan fictions. SO SORRY!

**Katara: **Well, we all forgive you and we're glad your feeling better.

**Me: **Thank you. Now I return TO DISCUSS LOTS OF SHIPPY STUFF THAT HAPPENED IN THE SEASON FINALE (and I think I missed the Earth King so we'll discuss that). But it also took a while to hunt these guys down to do interviews. FIRST UP AANG AND KATARA! -cheers-

**Aang **and **Katara: **Oh, no. Here we go again.

**Me: **Alright, probably the most shippy stuff with you guys since Cave of Two Lovers! First, we'll start off with the Earth King and digress into the finale! Okay, so nothing exciting in the first 2/3 of the episode but in the last 1/3 you guys found out you had to split up. Aang declares you just got 'the family back together.' Am I the only one who thought that was funny and/or cute? The family, Aang?

**Aang: **Well, Sokka, Katara, Toph, Appa and Momo. We're all family! We had just gotten Appa back!

**Me: **So you're suggesting you and Katara are already practically married, so you're family?

**Aang: **NO! I mean…well SOMEDAY! Gosh, you crazy shippers take every little thing we say and pick it apart! –folds arms and glares-

**Me: **Muhaha. That's our JOB, Aang.

**Aang: **You need to get a life.

**Me: **Yes, I know. Thank you. And the good thing about the 'family' splitting up was AANG GOT A KISS FROM KATARA! But seriously Aang you need to kiss _her._

**Aang: **Well…erm…

**Me: **AND THEN SOKKA HAD TO GO AND INTERRUPT AANG WHILE HE WAS CONFESSING HIS UNDYING LOVE FOR KATARA! -rips off head-

**Sokka: **AHH! That's what they were talking about?

**Aang: **Why do you make this sound like this is a soap opera? I'm not confessing my undying love for Katara! I was just telling her my feelings for her.

**Me: **…which is the same thing. Right?

**Aang: **NO! I'M A FREAKING 12 YEAR OLD! YOU SHIPPERS FORGET THAT! I DON'T HAVE AN UNDYING LOVE FOR HER. I'M NOT GOING TO SNEAK OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT TO HAVE SEX WITH HER BEFORE I FIGHT OZAI! SO STOP WRITING FAN FICTIONS ABOUT IT!

**Me: **Um…Aang…I didn't mention anything about these fanfictions and usually if they write any of that they age you and Katara up…do you perchance like to read these fanfictions?

**Aang: **Erm…NO! I'M JUST MAKING A POINT THAT I WASN'T CONFESSING MY UNDYING LOVE FOR HER.

**Katara: **You don't have an undying love for me?

**Aang: **Well, erm…you see I am twelve years old. Twelve year olds aren't supposed to have an undying love for someone. But I have as close as it for you.

**Katara: **Thank you, Aang. –hugs-

**Me: **See this isn't all bad! Okay, I really liked the little conversation you and Aang had at the end of this episode. –gets out remote and hits play- -screen comes from no where-

_**Sokka: **--and when we get back Suki's waiting for me._

_**Aang: **Yeah, girls are waiting for us. Thanks positive attitude._

_**Sokka: **Everything is going to work out perfectly, from now on and forever. _

-clip stops-

**Katara: **Aw, Aang. –leans towards Aang and kisses him- I'll always be home waiting for you.

**Me: **1…2…3…AW! But we soon find out things would not work out perfectly. Moving into the season finale…we know Azula has impersonated the Kyoshi Warriors. And sends the fandom (and mostly the Sukka shippers) into a scrambled frenzy about if Suki was alive or not. Did Azula take no prisoners and kill them all? Will we come to Book 3 and find Suki waking up in Azula's clothes? And most of all, why didn't Sokka react more when he found out? Surely these thoughts passed through your mind, Sokka.

**Sokka: **They did! And I'm extremely scared for her! When I found out my mind went blank and I couldn't think. There was hardly any time to think with the whole coup going on!

**Me: **But you are worried about her?

**Sokka: **DID YOU WATCH SERPENTS PASS? I was freaking out about a spider on her sleeping mat. And now…that wasn't enough…she could be gone…like Yue.

**Me: **I'm sorry, Sokka. If she really is…well…you know…it looks like you have a curse placed upon you. Any girl you get involved with comes to a sticky end. So there's been worries about Ty Lee and Toph.

**Sokka: **Okay, why are you people worried about Ty Lee? If she helped in…you know...why would I want to be with her? I said she was cute eariler but now I hate her guts. And Toph…well we don't know if Suki's dead yet. We can't prove this. And even if I were to get together with Toph, I think she could take care of herself.

**Toph: **Thanks, Sokka. –blushes-

**Me: **But that's what we thought about Suki, we thought she was able to keep herself safe but now she's missing in action. Speaking of Sokka and Toph though…I was looking through our archives and I remember when there wasn't ANY kind of hint towards you two. So I thought it was funny cause I hadn't seen any fanfictions with your pairings and now Toph's crush on Sokka is sorta canon. Maybe Mike and Brian are spying on this? HI! I mean…that's stupid I was just speculating right? Anyway, before we go anywhere else…back to Aang and Katara!

**Aang: **-sigh- What?

**Me: **Don't WHAT me. You know there's plenty to talk about here.

**Aang: **I know, I know the seventh chakra.

**Me: **No, before we get there…I'd like to bring up the second chakra.

**Aang: **-gulp- Please don't tell me this is going where I think this is going.

**Me: **First, Aang, please explain to Katara what chakra's are.

**Aang: **-sigh- Chakra's are spiraling pools of energy in our body. They're blocked and opened by certain emotional things. I had to open all seven to master the Avatar state.

**Me: **So the first one…the Earth Chakra…was in your ass. –snickers-

**Aang: **IN THE BASE OF MY SPINE!

**Me: **Ass.

**Aang: **Spine.

**Me: **Ass.

**Aang: **Spine.

**Me: **Ass.

**Aang: **Spine.

**Me: **ANYWAY! And he opened that one…so the chakra's go up the body in a chronological order. The next one…the water chakra was never mentioned WHERE it was. It deals with pleasure, Katara. The next one was in his stomach. It had to be somewhere in between his ass and stomach. –laughs evilly- -emphasize- It deals with pleasure.

**Aang: **-banging head against nearest rock- -shouts to heavens- PLEASE KILL ME NOW!

**Katara: **-eyes widen- Are you purposely trying to get me to think dirty thoughts about Aang?

**Me: **Yes…You know you want to think those thoughts…think those thoughts…the both of you…NOW! You two do have to repopulate the Airbenders…you won't be able to do that without doing dirty things.

**Katara: **YOU—THIS IS A CHILDRENS SHOW. YOU'VE SAID IT BEFORE! LOOK UP THERE YOUR SAYING BAD WORDS AND YOUR SAYING NAUGHTY THINGS ABOUT AANG AND I.

**Me: **-clicks rating- I just changed the rating. I can do whatever I want.

**Katara: **Uh! You—!

**Me: **-grins- Moving on. This one isn't bad, either. The fourth chakra dealt with love. The Guru told Aang that he had to let go of his grief for the Airbenders and his love was to be refilled with a new love and it showed you Katara. Then it showed Aang…crying. Which was so incredibly cute.

**Sokka: **Ha, Aang's such a wussy boy.

**Aang: **-shoots glare- I HAVE LOST ALL OF MY FAMILY, MY FRIENDS, MY MENTORS! THEN GURU PATHIK TOLD ME MY LOVE FOR KATARA WAS REBORN LOVE THAT I HAD FOR THE AIRBENDERS! YOU WOULD GET TEARY EYED TOO!

**Me: **Which was why it was so cute, Aang.

**Katara: **-smiles and takes Aang's hand-

**Aang: **-settles down and blushes-

**Me: **So this leads up to…the seventh chakra…the deadly chakra for all the Kataang shippers. Which may not be so deadly after all. So to open the last chakra Aang was told to let go of his earthly attachment, which was Katara. Well, Aang doesn't want to let go of Katara of course and but in the end the Guru convinces him to let go of her.

**Katara: **What…?

**Aang: **But I still love you Katara! And the chakra's are still open…I think.

**Me: **I'm getting there. Then Aang sees Katara in trouble then ditches the Guru in order to help Katara, but blocking the chakra meant he wouldn't be able to go into the Avatar state.

**Katara: **Oh, Aang. You'd choose me over the Avatar State?

**Aang:** Well, yeah.

**Katara: **-throws arms around him-

**Aang: **-blushes-

**Me: **BUT, Aang doesn't realize the Guru never told him to stop loving her. Like Aang pointed out 'THREE CHAKRA'S AGO THAT WAS A GOOD THING'. Yes, Aang. It's a very good thing. You just have to let go of those earthly attachments to her.

**Aang: **-scratches head- Okay…

**Me: **ANYWAY. Moving on. After you guys are fighting Azula and Zuko (ZUKO WE'RE GETTING TO YOU!) Azula KILLS Aang! IN THE AVATAR STATE! Everyone died then. You could just hear all us Avatards screaming NOOO! THANK GOD KATARA STILL HAD HER HEALING WATER. God, Katara if you had used that on Zuko—

**Katara: **I know, I know.

**Me: **Just a question, why didn't you use it on Jet?

**Katara: **I know, because the creators told me I had to save it for something FAR more plot involved and heart-wrenching.

**Me: **The creators told you…

**Katara: **YOU HALF-WIT! I couldn't have used it on Jet or else Aang would be dead. The creators wrote that I forgot about it so I could use it on something far more important.

**Me: **Right. Anyway. Go back and watch this scene where Aang comes back to life –plays clip- and then go back and watch where Katara finds Aang –plays clip-. Eerily similar. Anyway. ONTO ZUKO! Three chairs up here for Zuko, Katara and Mai.

**Katara: **WHY ME?

**Me: **Zutara shippers, sorry.

**Zuko: **-storms on stage- -rolls eyes-

**Mai: **Why me?

**Me: **Stop acting stupid. You haven't forgot that you have a crush on Zuko and now he's on your side. FIRST, we go back to the cave where Zuko and Katara were trapped in. This is the second cave with glowy crystals Katara has been stuck in a cave with a guy?

**Katara: **The first time was much more enjoyable.

**Me: **Uh huh. We saw that. Zuko got in there and then you went all bitchy on him.

**Katara: **Like using language now?

**Me: **Rating. –points-

**Zuko: **Boy I'll say. Don't even hear my side of the story. –rolls eyes-

**Me: **I know! Zuko was having the best day of his life being all happy and then Azula screws it over for you. I was waiting for you to break out into Spongebob's song, 'The Best Day Ever'! (Shameless plug to my Zuko video over at YouTube. Actually set to 'Best Day Ever' It's hilarious. Okay, back to the show!)

**Zuko: **You're weird.

**Me: **I know. Anyway, after Katara lets slip her mom was killed by Fire Nation all of a sudden you two are like best buddies nicey nice!

**Zuko: **Okay, not really.

**Me: **Yes. We went from this –plays clip-

_**Katara: **YOU'RE A HORRIBLE PERSON YOU KNOW THAT? _

**Me: **To…-plays next clip-

_**Zuko: **…even though I'll never be free of my mark._

_**Katara: **Maybe you can be. _

**Me: **GOD KATARA! So quick to trust. THAT WAS A MISTAKE!

**Katara: **Boy I guess.

**Me: **The real reason Zuko sided with Azula was because Aang stole Zuko's girl –plays clip-

_**Katara: **Aang! (hugs Aang)_

_(Aang is happy about her attention, and then shoots glare at Zuko. Zuko returns the glare)_

**Zuko: **THE AVATAR DID NOT STEAL MY GIRL! HE STOLE MY CHANCE TO BE FREE OF MY SCAR.

**Me: **Not according to Zutara shippers, but we aren't going there. Anyway, now to Mai. Out of this whole betrayal—

**Zuko: **It's not a betrayal if they didn't have my trust in the first place.

**Me: **Well, they pretty close to trusting you! And Katara trusted you apparently. Well, the only good thing that's come from this is either (A) Zuko backstabs Azula and gets her back from all those years or (B) Mai and Zuko spend some time together.

**Mai: **…No comment.

**Me: **YOU HAVE TO COMMENT! Here are my points for Maiko now:

-Zuko's of marrying age. (Yue was 16 when she was going to marry)

-Song and Jin are nice girls, but Mai's going back to the Fire Nation Palace. They'll still be in the Earth Kingdom.

-Mai is Fire Nation royalty. If she and Zuko hadn't already been planned to be married off, they should have been. Mai would be the only one to know the politics of the Fire Nation. Can you see Song or Jin as Fire Lady? No. Mai? Yes.

-Then there's always that childhood crush. They have a past.

**Zuko: **That's a dandy list but—hey that is a pretty good list. I can't argue, DAMN YOU CRAZY SHIPPERS!

**Mai: **So that means you're going to marry me?

**Me: **My job is done.

**Zuko: **I NEVER SAID THAT!

**Mai: **You said you can't argue with the list. The list said I should be your wife. –crosses arms-

**Zuko: **But—! -glares at me- I hate you.

**Me: **That's what I'm here for! And that about wraps up this edition of SHIP SHOWS! I hope to continue this until the new season if I get any new ideas…so if anyone else has an idea they'd like to see leave it in the review. Or if it's like really long PM me and I'll consider it. Oh yeah, THANK YOU TO ALL REVIEWERS!

**Zuko: **Get over here so I can toast you to a nice and crispy temperature. –chases after me while burning set-

**Me: **WHY IS IT EVERY SHOW THE SET IS BURNED DOWN?! AHHHHHH! NO ZUKO! DOWN BOY! AHHHHHHHH!!


	12. Back to the Future, kind of?

**A/N: **AHA I have inspiration! I finally went back through all my reviews and got all the inspiration I needed. First I'd like to thank everyone for all the reviews that I've gotten even though I haven't updated this since…December?? Wow…but I'm back and ready for some more torturing! I mean…interviews!! Now to reply to some reviews…

Liselle129 - Heh, I knew that. –headdesk- It was almost Christmas last time I updated and I wasn't thinking straight I suppose…I'll go fix that. –mumbles- It doesn't matter how many times I go back and reread it I always miss _something_.

Tinsel Tinkerbell – I see your point. Hm, I'll see what I can do, but most of the ships that could have a love triangle have already been brought up. I could have sworn that I'd have done something with some triangles…such as with whole SokkaxTyLee situation.

AmyAddict1- Thanks for more ships! More torture devices! I mean—interview points!

Everyone, thank Avatarfanx2 and This is My Pen Name DEAL for some of the ideas in here! Okay back to your regularly scheduled programming.

**o0o**

**Me: **OKAY! I got through that with only minor burns. But I'm here and alive!

**Audience: **-cheers-

**Zuko: **-groans- Noooo, why won't you die? And what about this set? Huh? It keeps getting rebuilt? How is that?

**Me: **Because it's my fan fiction and I can rebuild the set with my words…and I don't want to die –sticks tongue out-

**Zuko: **-starts to lunge for me- -is stopped by security-

**Me: **Muhahaha…ha.

**Zuko: **Grrrrrr…

**Me: **Well we have some ships for you guys! CRACK SHIPS!

**Zuko: **They're called that because you're on crack when you come up with these? That's illegal, I'll report you to the…to these security people.

**Me: **No. Search me. Strip-search me if you want! Er…okay never mind we don't have time for that.

**Zuko: **Thank you, none of us want to see that.

**Me: **Okay…FIRST STRIP! I-I MEAN SHIP! **Aang x Ty Lee**

**Aang: **What…the…heck.

**Ty Lee: **Okay…

**Me: **Work with me!! You both have bubbly personalities. Why not?

**Aang: **Have we had ANY interaction through the whole series? No.

**Me: **Well, it's just because you're always fighting Azula. But honestly, both of you have happy-go-lucky personalities.

**Aang: **Are you trying to fight for us? I thought you 'shipped' Katara and I!

**Me: **I do, I'm just bringing up points. I'm trying to prove this show isn't so one-sided but if you aren't going to work with me…Anyway, next ship. **Zuko x Toph **or what I like to say, **Toko. **XD Get it? Like tacos? –is only one laughing- -crickets chirp- Ahem. You're thoughts?

**Zuko: **Me and the little blind girl? Oh yeah, I can see a passionate relationship there. –rolls eyes- She's like what eight years old?

**Toph: **Twelve, thank you. And you people are WEIRD. I hardly know who he is.

**Me: **Okay, let's get you two acquainted. Toph, Zuko is what seventeen now? And he was banished from his home at age fourteen and enjoys long walks on the beach.

**Zuko: **What the hell? I do not enjoy long walks on the beach!

**Me: **Oh really? -clicks a button- -picture of Mai and Zuko walking hand in hand on the beach-

**Zuko: **HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET THOSE PICTURES?!

**Me: **XD!! I WAS KIDDING! I super-imposed your faces in there. You guys take walks on the beach?! I never thought you had much interaction in the show…

**Zuko: **UNCLE PUT ALCOHOL IN MY TEA LAST NIGHT AND I HAD THIS AWFUL HANGOVER THIS MORNING AND—Damn it, did I just say that out loud?

**Me: **XD!!!!!!! ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR IROH EVERYONE!

**Iroh: **Well, after seeing your show yesterday I thought my nephew should loosen up.

**Me: **How'd you do it?

**Iroh: **A little slip of the hand over dinner. -evil grin-

**Me: **Very nice. Okay, now speaking of getting Toph acquainted with people…and apparently this show has turned into a dating service…let's get to know Teo!

**Teo: **-walks in with his Dad- Hello? We're here for the 'Inventors Convention'?

**Me: **Well, your at the right place! –grins-

**Teo: **Are you sure…?

**Me:** Yup.

**Teo: **It doesn't look like it.

**Katara: **Teo, it's a trap run!

**Teo: **Katara! Aang! Sokka! What are you doing here?

-door locks-

**Me: **Teo, you're not really at a convention. You're really here at a show called 'Ship Shows' and one of our reviewers have requested you come and be introduced one of our lovely young ladies. Well, I would have done it eventually if it wasn't requested cause I love this ship too.

**Teo: **-blank stare-

**Aang: **Teo! Now your stuck here. It's this crazy girl. She's trapped us all here and tried to force us to all get together. You know as in relationships? And now she's trying to pair you up with one of our new friends that you haven't met before.

**Me: **That's right! Meet Toph. Toph, Teo. Teo, Toph.

**Toph: **Uh…hi.

**Teo: **Hi…

**Me: **Now, go have fun, kids! Have dinner! Get to know each other! Alright, we'll check up on them later. Our next section part of the show was also suggested to us by a viewer of the show. Time-travel!

**Zuko: **Time travel! There's no such thing! And why?

**Me: **To bring the next generation onto the show of course!

-blank stares-

**Me: **Your children? As in your own flesh and blood?

**Katara: **You're serious?

**Aang: **You can do that?

**Zuko: **And maybe pigs will fly!

**Me: **I don't know about pigs, but boars…the Bei Fong family symbol is a flying boar. Which is closely related to the pig.

**Zuko:** Damn it. I've been hanging around you're world too much! I've been picking up your sayings and I forget that in our world we have such things as flying pigs!

**Me: **Sorry about that! Now, time to time travel. –pulls open door- This will be our second time time traveling, thanks to the world of Harry Potter.

**Katara: **Who is that?

**Me: **That my friends, is Hermione Granger of the Harry Potter series.

**Zuko: **Now she's kidnapping people from other worlds!

**Hermione: **-struggling-

**Me: **And by the power of magic, I've brought her third year self and so on her person…-walks around to Hermione and takes gold chain around her neck- …is the Time-Turner. Thank you, Hermione.

–Hermione disappears-

**Me: **Okay, now to figure out how to get your kids here without altering the timeline. –bangs it a few times- -bright flash- -a girl and boy appear-

**Me: **Hello.

**Girl: **W-where are we?

**Boy: **Who are you!?

**Me:** I am Kat. I'm sorry, I'm not from your world. But these people are. You might know them as your parents. Care to introduce yourselves? At the beginning of this game show they were in denial about their relationships. Now their romances are budding and love is in the air and your appearance is to seal their destinies. –first grabs Aang and Katara- Do these two look familiar to one of you two.

**Boy: **S-spirits…that's my Mom and Dad! Except they're…kids!

-Aang and Katara stare at each other-

**Aang: **Okay, this is a little weird!

**Katara: **Uhm…okay…I don't know if I want to know or not.

**Me: **Go talk to him.

**Aang and Katara's Son: **Mom, Dad it's me! Don't you recognize your own son?!

**Aang: **Hate to tell you this, but you haven't been...born yet.

**Aang and Katara's Son: **Oh, right. Obviously.

**Me: **So that means…Zuko, Mai…this is you're daughter.

**Zuko and Mai's daughter: **Hi, Mom! Hi, Dad!

**Zuko: **AHH! Get away from me! Freaky girl version clone! –hides behind Mai-

**Zuko and Mai's daughter: **Dad!

**Zuko: **I don't know if anyone in the future has ever told you this, but…you're weird.

**Mai: **Zuko. She's you're daughter. If she's weird…you're weird.

**Zuko: **AM I THE ONLY ONE FREAKED OUT BY SEEING MY OWN…GIRL CLONE OF ME STANDING THERE!?

**Mai: **I'll admit, it's a little creepy.

**Aang: **-is all of a sudden excited- So what happens in the future? Do Katara and I get married? Oh, well obviously if we have kids. –GASP- Unless, I get you pregnant and then die in my tragic fight against Ozai before we get married! Oh, wait. Then our son wouldn't know who I am. And that would be stupid…if I got you pregnant when we're like this age. And a little gross.

**Katara: **Unless you decide to get me pregnant and decided to leave me.

**Aang: **Why would I do that?

**Aang and Katara's Son: **Nobody's leaving anyone! We're all a happy family!

**Aang: **We're _all_? How many kids do we have? Where do we live? I NEED TO KNOW THESE ANSWERS!

**Aang and Katara's Son: **Sorry.

**Katara: **Sorry what?

**Aang and Katara's Son: **Can't tell you.

**Aang: **WHY NOT!?

**Aang and Katara's Son:** I was put under a strict contract I couldn't release too much information about the future.

**Aang: **I DIDN'T SEE A CONTRACT!

**Aang and Katara's Son: **Calm down, Dad! It was Kat.

**Me: **-fingers two scrolls that appear to be contracts-

**Katara: **How?

**Me: **See…we did this and it didn't turn out so great the first time because your children revealed you're whole future, so I went back in time and I put them under contracts.

**Katara: **Time-turners don't work like that! At least what you've said about them.

**Me: **I know…now I'm using the 'Lost' philosophy. You know that show on ABC? Where that guy Desmond lives his whole life like for the second time and he changes stuff, like saving Charlie's life and it's really confusing because personally I really don't think that show is going anywhere and they're leading us around in circles? Yeah…like the Polar Bear! Where did that come from!? Are we ever going to see that again!? –rants on to self-

**Everyone: **-blank stares-

**Zuko: **Okay, you get into way too many things. This Harry Potter, now Lost…

**Me: **Just bond with your kids! That's all we have time for, for this week. Tune in next time for our update on Toph and Teo and…we'll find something else to do…if you want to see your idea on the show just like Avatarfanx2 and This Is My Pen Name DEAL, remember to review!

**o0o**

**A/N after the show: **Okay, I hope that went over okay. I didn't do names for their kids because I can't come up with names for my life unless its a long planned out fanfiction and I didn't feel like coming up with new names XD.


	13. Discussion of the Finale

"Hello, one and all! And welcome to another exciting episode of Ship Shows! After a long hiatus, the one and only is back on air!" I exclaimed.

"What is this!?" Sokka demanded. "You leave for a year, you come back…and now we're all in QUOTATIONS!?"

"Yes, well, my other fic was BANNED for using somewhat of the same transcript style of writing and since that is _really_ against the rules…I decided I should actually follow them. Mostly for fear my entire account will be banned and you shall all die." I explained.

"Only because you're a goody two-shoes you mean?" Zuko asked.

"No one called for that. Do you want all of the glorious fics I let you star in to vanish?"

"Yes."

"Okay, moving right along…since my departure we've seen the FINALE of all FINALES!" I proclaimed.

Aang was the only one who clapped enthusiastically.

"Be more excited please?" I begged.

"Yay…"

"Woohoo…"

"Guys, Aang defeated the Fire Nation and completed his Avatar destiny to bring peace to the world."

"_I am_ very proud of you, Aang!" Katara beamed.

"It really isn't that big of a deal, Aang did his job. We helped." Toph shrugged.

"And you succeeded! With Zuko as the new Fire Lord! Tell us about that Zuko!" I inquired.

"Why should I have to?" Zuko asked.

"Because this is an interview show."

"It's great. My sister's insane, my father's in jail and my mother's missing."

"Let's not focus on the negative aspects! What about you and Mai?" I questioned eagerly.

"What about us?" Mai rolled her eyes.

"Future plans now that the war is over?"

"I'm kind of busy, putting the world at peace. In fact, I shouldn't be here. Why did I ever answer that damn memo that the show was coming back when I got it?" Zuko muttered as he tried to escape the TV set.

"Security!" I called.

"You can't do that!" Zuko shouted as two hefty security guards got in the way of Zuko and his escape. "I'm the Fire Lord! GUARDS!" Ten Fire Palace guards appeared almost out of nowhere to challenge the largish security guards.

"Okay, okay. Let's not destroy the set this early. Cool it, Zuko and I promise this will be over soon."

"Whatever. Just don't talk to me or Mai."

"Don't you mean Mai or I?" Aang corrected the Fire Lord.

"Don't talk to me!" Zuko roared at the Avatar.

"Ok, ok. Not talking to Zuko. AANG! Hi." I grinned.

"Hi." Aang looked apprehensive.

"So…after three seasons of buildup to Kataang, how'd it feel?" I asked, the grin still plastered to my face.

"How'd what feel?"

"You know, you and Katara's big make out scene by the sunset." I sighed with content.

"Uhm…happy."

"It was wonderful! I couldn't have planned it better. Aang just defeating the Fire Lord…a peaceful Ba Sing Se…no more pressures to save the world…just Aang and I…it was the perfect moment!" Katara crooned.

"What she said." Aang agreed.

"Well, you did have us worried for a little Katara. You and Zuko—"

"Why are you dragging me back here?" Zuko groaned.

"—ZUKO…ahem…were hanging around with each other for a little. What was with the Katara-Zuko ninja episode?"

"What?" Katara looked puzzled.

"She means when we went to go take revenge on the man who killed your mother. Look, the Avatar wouldn't help her because of his monk ways. I felt if I could help Katara it would help her get over her anger towards me and maybe helping me help my mother in some ways." Zuko explained.

"Cue the 'AWW.' Which reminds me…we never found out what happened to your mother!" I exclaimed.

"Well, I never found out either. It's my personal business anyway." Zuko growled.

"I never get anywhere with you." I sighed.

"Then stop trying so hard."

"Whatever…okay. Now that we've talked to Aang and Katara, and Zuko and Mai…let's turn our attention to SOKKA AND SUKI! Cue the applause, people."

Applause lightly broke out.

"Okay, okay, calm down people. Don't get over excited." Sokka growled bitterly.

"So how do you all feel now that the series is over? Future plans?" I pressed.

"Well, honestly, for now, I'm just glad she isn't dead. For a while it looked as if my choice in women was cursed." Sokka explained.

"I wouldn't die off that easily!" Suki scoffed.

"I didn't think so, but do you blame me for being worried!?" Sokka rebuked.

"Yes, yes. But a spider won't kill me either."

"What?"

"Do you remember? Serpent's pass? Ugh, never mind. There's too many brain cells already lost." Suki gave up.

"Alright…let's turn to some concerns of the reviewers…in our long absence there are many. Zuko and—"

"CAN YOU LEAVE ME ALONE ALREADY!?"

"You are just a point of interest. Sorry, love."

"ARGH."

"Alright, one of our reviewers, Golden Solidus, brought up the point that Zuko and Toph or Toko as we all love to call it should not be a crack pairing. As this was written before season three Toph and Zuko had never even met. And so now that we've all seen season three…Zuko and Toph…what do you think of this pairing as more of a serious pairing now? In some of the last few episodes Toph was more than eager to go on her own 'field trip' with Zuko."

"Okay, maybe we've talked more since I've joined the Avatar's little group. But that doesn't change how I feel for Mai. I knew Mai before I had even known the little blind girl." Zuko clarified.

"Now, come on I've seen how you confide in each other. Toph was the only one who trusted you when you joined! She sought you out when no one else would even listen."

"That's cause I was the only one with any sense. I knew Aang would have to learn Firebending and Zuko was a Firebending. He came to us, practically gift wrapped with a bow on top saying 'TAKE THIS FIREBENDER TO TRAIN WITH' and we refused him. The only way Aang was going to defeat the Fire Lord was to train with the Fire Lord's son." Toph explained her side of the story.

"Okay, good enough for me. Move on." Zuko folded his arms. "No 'me and little eight year old' pairing."

"I'm twelve."

"Whatever."

"Okay. M_eleven10 sent us some crack pairings. Would we like to try these on for size?" I offered.

"As long as I'm not in any of them!" Zuko declared.

"You're in one."

"THEN NO."

"You and Ty Lee."

"HELL NO."

"Hi, Zuko!" Ty Lee giggled and waved from behind the crew to the set.

"Don't give any ideas!" Zuko growled.

"There was some high tension between you guys on 'The Beach' episode." I pushed.

"Yeah, there was high tension between everyone." Zuko hissed.

"Okay, okay. I'll stop. Bring in all the other characters for the crack! And as those people are being brought on stage let's get another crack pairing done! You've heard of Sokka and Azula, what about Mai and Sokka?!"

"Please, please don't ship me with any of the Fire Ladies!" Sokka begged.

"Really, it doesn't work. I could never be with a buffoon like him." Mai rolled her eyes.

"And Zuko's much better?" Sokka hissed. Zuko immediately stood up looking for a fight.

"Yeah, he is." Mai nodded her head.

"Okay, okay. Before we have to call security to break up a fight! Our next people are out!" I directed everyone's attention to the row of people now sitting behind the first row of main characters. "Let's welcome Ozai, Jun and Zhao."

"Are you shipping it three ways?" Aang asked, confused.

"No! But that be interesting." I grinned with a gleam in my eye.

"Please don't!" Everyone screamed simultaneously.

"Okay, okay. First, we have the wonderfully defeated Fire Lord Ozai! (chained and brought here by the wonderful guards of the Fire Nation) Shipped with bounty hunter Jun!"

"Is this what you brought me here for? Nyla is waiting outside. On my cue she can come in here and kill you all." Jun threatened.

"That isn't necessary!" I hurriedly explained.

"Really…I was once a great ruler of a nation and now I'm reduced to something so little they put me on soapy daytime talk shows?" the pathetic Fire Lord sighed.

"There's something we can agree on." Zuko mumbled. "And I did nothing to deserve _this." _

"Okay, there's that shipping. Why is Admiral Monkey-face back from the dead?" Sokka asked.

"I am not—"

"Good question, Sokka. This crack pairing includes Katara and Admiral Monkey-face!"

"Disgusting…" Katara sighed. "I'm not even going to try to try to fight any more. You can think we're in love for all I care."

"You brought me back from the dead for this? I can't be—"

"Seriously, how did you bring him back to life?" Aang asked.

"Don't ask."

"I wouldn't, Aang! You know all the crazy voodoo she can do!" Sokka warned.

"Yeah, she brought our children here." Zuko shuddered.

"Speaking of which that interview was a hit! Let's bring them back!" I suggested.

"No! I'm done with this interview show!" Zuko growled.

"BRING IN THE TIME TURNERS."

"DON'T BRING IN THE TIME TURNERS."

"Or what?" I asked, though I knew what was coming.

Zuko fired up his Firebending and commenced his tradition of destroying the studio.

"Please exit in an orderly fashion. The fire department will be here in a while…" I impatiently herded the cast and crew outside as the inside continued to burn. Once everyone was outside I declared the show was over, "Well, that's another fantastic show done here at Ship Shows! Stay tuned for whenever our next episode comes out!"

**A/N: **And yes. The return of the horribly infamous Ship Shows. In quotation style. I figured since my 'What's a DVD?' story got deleted for 'transcript format' then I should change this up. Why wouldn't they take this one before that one? Anyway. Your reviews make the show from this point. See a ship you want discussed? Do you want a specific part of the finale (or any episode for that matter) discussed? Really, I didn't get in depth with the finale, because frankly, I'm embarrassed to say I haven't seen the finale since it premiered (and of course the couple times they re-aired it). I have the DVD but I haven't watched it because I've been waiting to sit down with my brother to watch it. Yeah. I can't wait to do anything with him.


	14. The Last Failbender?

"You've got to be kidding me."

One by one, the Fire Lord appeared, followed by the Avatar. Then their each one of their friends followed them.

"What the hell is going on?" Sokka demanded. "Don't try any thing tricky! If you hurt Suki I swear—"

"Sokka, you idiot. You don't remember what happened last time this happened?" Zuko snapped.

"No. _I_ don't remember." Katara demanded.

"I don't remember either. Maybe this only happened to Zuko." Aang shrugged.

"IT HAPPENED TO ALL OF US. Remember that stalker kidnapped us all and tried to pair us all together like some sort of freakish dating show?" Zuko demanded.

"I don't remember this." Sokka scratched his head.

"Not ringing any bells for me either…" Suki shrugged.

"I burned down the place like ten times?" Zuko rolled his eyes. "Except this isn't the normal place we get dragged to. Maybe that's why no one is remembering. But there was that crazy girl?"

"Oh…I think I'm remembering…" Aang scratched his face.

"I got nothing. This was before I joined right?" Toph asked.

An ominous figure crept out of the shadows. It snuck up behind the group that was clearly out of place in this world. "I'm baackkkk!"

"IT'S YOU!"

"Finally you all remember!" Zuko groaned.

"Time for a little fun!" I rubbed my hands together.

"WHY ARE WE BACK HERE?" Sokka screamed.

"Yeah! Our show ended like years ago. Leave us alone! Besides you neglected us anyway. I had a date with Teo that never ended. It got boring really fast since you forgot." Toph reminded me.

"Oh snap. I did? I should have fixed that. Uhm. Enjoy your privacy? How'd it go? Any TophTeo babies yet?" I offered.

"Whatever." Toph shrugged.

"So what are we doing here since our show is over?" Sokka demanded.

"Well technically two things. First I heard a rumor about a new show called Avatar: Legend of Korra. But it takes place seventy years in the future. So you'll all be dead except for Aang who will be a spirit. Good luck with getting into flashbacks the rest of you!" I grinned.

"What the hell…?" Zuko glanced at Mai who was clutching his arm. She looked apathetic and shrugged.

"Secondly, in my world they not only have a show for you guys but a live action movie!" I exclaimed. "It just came out and it sucks! Okay well not sucks…but didn't live up to my expectations. And I'm making you all watch it!" I laughed evilly. If we all had to watch it as a fandom why not them?

"If it's that bad, why do we have to watch it?" Sokka asked.

"Because it's fun!" I grinned. "Why else? And to get your reactions. That's my job as the host of this show right? It's not shippy…but what the heck. Now in you go! Tickets were already paid for….GO!"

An hour and forty minutes later…

"What the hell was that?" Zuko asked.

"Did the Ember Island Players finally get a bigger budget or what?" Sokka laughed wiping away tears.

"It looked like it…though it wasn't the same actors…or not all of them…I wasn't a girl at least…or was I?" Aang shrugged.

"No, you were just a mindless, emotionless zombie." Katara folded her arms.

"But why the hell did everyone call you 'Ong'? They don't even know how to pronounce 'Ahvatar'." Zuko rolled his eyes. "They called Uncle 'EAR-oh', too!"

"Don't forget me! I'm Sohka!" Sokka laughed harder. "And what the hell was with your actor?" Sokka laughed at Zuko.

"Where was I?" Suki demanded. "I met you sometime in that time frame!"

"What the hell was with my family and nation?" Zuko groaned.

"Okay! Let's not linger too much on the bad!" I swept in on them. "Take a seat, take a seat." I motioned to the chairs and sound stage that had been automatically summoned from nowhere.

"All right, let's get this over with." Sokka rolled his eyes. "I'm starving, so I want to get out of here. Are you making dinner tonight?" Sokka turned to Suki.

"Yeah…what else are we doing?" Suki shrugged.

"Hey, let's not ignore the entire reason we're here!" I called the attention back to me.

"All right, why else did you bring us here to talk?" Katara asked. "Some new development about our show?"

"_Yes!_" I exclaimed. "Okay, here's how it's going down. Next year, our world time, there's going to be a new series."

"Great, you can torture us some more." Zuko groaned.

"No! Well yes. Technically. Because….this series is seventy years in the future!" I exclaimed.

"And…? Who wants to watch a bunch of old people?" Toph shrugged.

"Hrm…it's not about you guys…cause you're all dead, for the most part." I nervously scratched my face. "Well, Aang is for sure. And we're pretty sure about the rest of you…"

"You brought us here to tell us we'll be dead in seventy years…great…" Mai sighed.

"This is sounding awful…let me give you the premise!" I exclaimed, pulling out my laptop and opening a new Internet window displaying the Avatar Wiki page. "I can't get my facts wrong here," I answered to their odd looks at the computer. The looks were probably because they'd never seen a computer before, not because I had to look up the page with the summary on it. "Okay, confirmed legit summary here is Korra is a rebellious girl from the Southern Water Tribe and also the next Avatar. Uh…" I scanned the page quickly. "She's already mastered the first three elements…needs to master Airbending where Katara and Aang's little lovechild comes in and teaches the next Avatar. Yadda, yadda…Oh, there's an anti-bending movement going on…" I ranted as I scanned.

"An anti-bending movement!" Aang exclaimed.

"What the hell happened to the world in the next seventy years? Did we screw it up that badly?" Zuko groaned.

"Finally!" Sokka exclaimed. "I mean—eugh? That's awful!" Sokka shouted.

"Don't be so against this Avatar, Sokka! There has been speculation that this Avatar may be one of your descendents." I explained.

"What?" Sokka furrowed his brow.

"Think about it Sokka…She's from the Southern Tribe." Katara shrugged.

"But from a family of nonbenders comes the AVATAR?" Sokka motioned to he and Suki.

"You technically have bending in your blood." Katara motioned to herself.

"Okay, what if she's yours though? Is there some rule that she can't be related to the past Avatar? Where are you and Aang living after the war?" Sokka asked.

"I think that'd be weird if she were related to her past life…" Aang shrugged.

"Well, I'm saying it'd be a little too much of a coincidence if it were Sokka and Suki's grandchild. Of course after going on record saying she isn't, she probably will be. Southern Water Tribe is a pretty small place…though it has grown since the last series I'm sure…so what the heck." I shrugged. "So Zuko…your voice actor has done some work, and it has 'something to do with Zuko'." I directed my attention back to Zuko.

"So my voice is back, but not me?" Zuko shrugged.

"It'll probably be your handsome, less-scared, beautiful son." Katara giggled.

"His son is probably already Fire Lord since we're all apparently dead." Aang shrugged.

"There's always flashbacks! We want to know what you guys are up to now via flashbacks! ZUKO WHERE THE HELL IS YOUR MOTHER!" I screamed.

"I hope you find out during flashbacks?" Zuko suggested.

"I hope so, too. For your sake." I threatened. "The last rumor that has any interest to me is that the cabbage merchant won't appear, but 'his legacy will appear in some form'. Thoughts, guys?" I asked.

"Why bring this poor guy back after seventy years?" Sokka groaned.

"They aren't bringing him back, didn't you listen?" Katara rolled her eyes.

"I'm confused." Toph sighed. "As always."

"I am too." Zuko furrowed his brows.

"Crazy cabbage merchant who followed us everywhere? Were you not there for that?" Aang asked.

"No! He was there when we were trying to get a ferry to Ba Sing Se!" Katara exclaimed.

"I'm sorry I don't pay attention to merchants…" Toph shook her head.

"Do they always act like this?" Mai asked Zuko.

"Yeah, pretty much." Zuko shrugged.

"I may have remembered a distraught cabbage merchant coming through…but it's kind of fuzzy…did he ever come to Kyoshi?" Suki asked.

"I don't know if he ever made it that far, but he was in Omashu…" Sokka explained. Suki shrugged.

"So what about the legacy for the ones who remember?" I asked.

"Cabbages hidden everywhere we go?" Aang asked.

"The Merchants son everywhere we go!" Katara exclaimed.

"To repetitive…" Sokka shook his head.

"Then what?" Katara folded her arms.

"A squash merchant!" Sokka exclaimed.

"I swear you were dropped on your head as a child." Katara sighed.

"Okay, before we all go, let's remember our purpose in life."

"Being the Avatar?" Aang asked.

"No, dumbass." I rolled my eyes. "Being on this show and being at the beck and call of the reviewers. We have a ship from a reviewer and since this is Ship Shows..."

"Just shoot, I'm so done with this place." Katara sighed.

"From Avagrl-Kataang-lova, we have TophxIroh! I can't believe I haven't thought of this! I haven't thought of this before have I? I'm to lazy to look back at other chapters. So Toph? Zuko where's your dear old Uncle?" I asked as Iroh poofed onto stage. "Iroh, your ship is TophxIroh how 'bout it?"

"Isn't that like child molestation?" Toph squeezed her eyes.

"I agree, that's highly inappropriate..." Iroh shuttered.

"You guys shared tea! It was cute! And then when Iroh showed up in Ba Sing Se and you were best buddies, it was adorable. I never meant it in any kind of sexual way, I meant friendly, of course!" I put my best smile on.

"Whatever. You are the biggest pervert, shipper, person, ah, er..." Zuko stuttered.

"Shut up, Zuko. You don't know me." I snapped. "Well, I suppose that about wraps it up…if you have any crazy rumors…or questions about the movie…or…all around crazy shit you want me to do with these guys…send it in via review or PM and we'll see if I get enough material or inspiration to write another chapter. Because if not I'll see you guys at the premiere of Korra! It probably will still be that long…only eleven more months! Well, if that's about it…DID WE END THIS CHAPTER WITHOUT BURNING DOWN THE SET?" I praised Zuko.

"Would you like me to?"

"Please, don't."

"I'm kind of feeling like burning something."

"Don't…pleasseeee."

"After seeing that movie…I have that urge." Flames licked his fingers.

"I did too but please…restrain…your…self…GODDAMNITTT SAVE YOURSELVES! UNTIL NEXT TIME FOLKS."


End file.
